If I Were Not A Wizard

If I were not a wizard,
With craft unkind and keen,
You wouldn't have to worry 
That you might wake up green. 
I couldn't with no fanfare,
and a minimum of fuss,
Transform you into butter 
Or a hippopotamus.
If I were not a wizard,
Unwaveringly weird,
You'd not have sprouted antlers
And a fifty-foot-long beard.
I'd lack the talent to transmute
Your breakfast into leaves, 
And there would be no butterflies
Residing in your sleeves.

You'd find no fish and melons
Perched atop your feathered head
Your ears would not be fashioned
Out of jam and gingerbread
I'd never have transmogrified
Your nose into a yam,
If I were not a wizard - 
But then again . . . I am!

Jack Prelutsky



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